It's the last day of the month...
Erkk!! Another month is passing by. Gosh, how time flies.
I sort of migrated from an old life about five months back. Basically, my appearance changed. Some would say to the worse. But I would say, to my true self. My mum, blessed her, is not really happy with the change. But at least, she's not forcing me to be who I am not, God please, no. I want her to be happy, but in this, I know, I have to be happy and satisfied first. Let me make my life's journey by starting all over again.
When I decided to bring out my true colours, I had mixed emotions. Throughout my life, I would say, my decisions were based on what other people would perceive and say. Most of the times, the decisions were made to make other people happy instead of satisfying my need. Oh... I was... selfless. To the extend I was walked all over to hell and back. I had my stand, but I always put others before me. Very nice of me.
I still do now. Put other people's feelings and needs before me. When I need to. But if the decision only concern me, then my needs come first. Of course, you might say. Well, I didn't see it that way before.
Still, so far the changes that I made, some would definitely say that I'm getting more out of control. But, honestly, I know my limits, and by all means, I am making up for the time that I lost. And knowing myself, this... phase that I'm going through won't be long. It might last for another few months, then sanity will kick in and I'll slowly go saner. In fact, it has already started knocking on my grey areas.
There's this... emptiness inside of me. Something that I want to do, but I do not know what exactly. I feel that I need to... do something, learn something, give something. I still can't figure it out. I want to do something more in my life, than just work, hang around, come back home, be with the family. I want something else. Something that has more meaning. I guess.
Anyway, I was talking about the change. Actually, there's nothing new about it, at least not to people who are close to me. It's just the fact that now I'm being honest to myself. Being who I really am inside. I am blessed with friends that are real friends. Thank God for that.
It'll be a new month tomorrow. I sincerely hope that this year, different things, greater things will happen for me, in a better way. Delicious way. Oh... I really want to meet more people. Broaden up my circle of network. I can't be rotting in my comfort zone forever. So, anyone out there wants to get to know me, are very much welcomed. I can be an introvert and extrovert at the same time. Complex, in a way. That's who I am. But in a nutshell, I'm just a simple easy going person once you get the hang of it. Ha ha ha... can you understand that.
By the way, I have a bet that I'm winning tomorrow. I will probably blog about it.
Happy New Year to all Muslims. (hah! first day of a new year!)
I sort of migrated from an old life about five months back. Basically, my appearance changed. Some would say to the worse. But I would say, to my true self. My mum, blessed her, is not really happy with the change. But at least, she's not forcing me to be who I am not, God please, no. I want her to be happy, but in this, I know, I have to be happy and satisfied first. Let me make my life's journey by starting all over again.
When I decided to bring out my true colours, I had mixed emotions. Throughout my life, I would say, my decisions were based on what other people would perceive and say. Most of the times, the decisions were made to make other people happy instead of satisfying my need. Oh... I was... selfless. To the extend I was walked all over to hell and back. I had my stand, but I always put others before me. Very nice of me.
I still do now. Put other people's feelings and needs before me. When I need to. But if the decision only concern me, then my needs come first. Of course, you might say. Well, I didn't see it that way before.
Still, so far the changes that I made, some would definitely say that I'm getting more out of control. But, honestly, I know my limits, and by all means, I am making up for the time that I lost. And knowing myself, this... phase that I'm going through won't be long. It might last for another few months, then sanity will kick in and I'll slowly go saner. In fact, it has already started knocking on my grey areas.
There's this... emptiness inside of me. Something that I want to do, but I do not know what exactly. I feel that I need to... do something, learn something, give something. I still can't figure it out. I want to do something more in my life, than just work, hang around, come back home, be with the family. I want something else. Something that has more meaning. I guess.
Anyway, I was talking about the change. Actually, there's nothing new about it, at least not to people who are close to me. It's just the fact that now I'm being honest to myself. Being who I really am inside. I am blessed with friends that are real friends. Thank God for that.
It'll be a new month tomorrow. I sincerely hope that this year, different things, greater things will happen for me, in a better way. Delicious way. Oh... I really want to meet more people. Broaden up my circle of network. I can't be rotting in my comfort zone forever. So, anyone out there wants to get to know me, are very much welcomed. I can be an introvert and extrovert at the same time. Complex, in a way. That's who I am. But in a nutshell, I'm just a simple easy going person once you get the hang of it. Ha ha ha... can you understand that.
By the way, I have a bet that I'm winning tomorrow. I will probably blog about it.
Happy New Year to all Muslims. (hah! first day of a new year!)
posted by Hajar | 7:38:00 PM
1 Comments:
KENYATAAN HIDUP DISEBALIK PERMAINAN INI.
Seorang guru wanita sedang bersemangat mengajarkan sesuatu kepada
murid-muridnya. Ia duduk menghadap murid-muridnya. Di tangan kirinya ada kapur, di tangan kanannya ada pemadam. Guru itu berkata, "Saya ada satu permainan... Caranya begini, ditangan kiri saya ada kapur, di tangan kanan ada pemadam. Jika saya angkat kapur ini, maka berserulah "Kapur!", jika saya angkat pemadam ini, maka katalah "Pemadam!"
Murid muridnya pun mengerti dan mengikuti. Guru berganti-gantian mengangkat antara kanan dan kiri tangannya, semakin lama semakin cepat. Beberapa saat kemudian guru kembali berkata, "Baik sekarang perhatikan. Jika saya angkat kapur, maka sebutlah "Pemadam!", jika saya angkat pemadam, maka katakanlah "Kapur!". Dan diulangkan seperti tadi, tentu saja murid-murid tadi keliru dan kekok, dan sangat sukar untuk mengubahnya. Namun lambat laun, mereka sudah biasa dan tidak lagi kekok. Selang beberapa saat, permainan berhenti.
Sang guru tersenyum kepada murid-muridnya. "Murid-murid, begitulah kita
umat Islam. Mulanya yang haq itu haq, yang bathil itu bathil. Kita begitu jelas membezakannya. Namun kemudian, musuh musuh kita memaksakan kepada kita dengan perbagai cara, untuk menukarkan sesuatu, dari yang haq menjadi bathil, dan sebaliknya. Pertama-tama mungkin akan sukar bagi kita menerima hal tersebut, tapi kerana terus disosialisasikan dengan cara-cara menarik oleh mereka, akhirnya lambat laun kamu akan terbiasa dengan hal itu. Dan anda mulai dapat mengikutinya. Musuh-musuh kamu tidak pernah berhenti membalik dan menukar nilai dan ketika.
"Keluar berduaan, berkasih-kasihan tidak lagi sesuatu yang pelik, Zina
tidak lagi jadi persoalan, pakaian seksi menjadi hal yang lumrah, tanpa
rasa malu, sex sebelum nikah menjadi suatu kebiasaan dan trend, hiburan
yang asyik dan panjang sehingga melupakan yang wajib adalah biasa,
materialistik kini menjadi suatu gaya hidup dan lain lain." "Semuanya sudah terbalik. Dan tanpa disedari, anda sedikit demi sedikit menerimanya tanpa rasa ia satu kesalahan dan kemaksiatan. Paham?" tanya Guru kepada murid-muridnya. "Paham cikgu..."
“Baik permainan kedua..." begitu Guru melanjutkan."Cikgu ada Qur'an,cikgu akan letakkannya di tengah karpet. Sekarang anda berdiri diluar karpet. Permainannya adalah, bagaimana caranya mengambil Qur'an yang ada ditengah tanpa memijak karpet?"
Murid-muridnya berpikir . Ada yang mencuba alternatif dengan tongkat,dan lain-lain. Akhirnya Guru memberikan jalan keluar, digulungnya karpet, dan ia ambil Qur'an. Ia memenuhi syarat, tidak memijak karpet."Murid-murid, begitulah ummat Islam dan musuh-musuhnya...Musuh-musuh Islam tidak akan memijak-mijak anda dengan terang-terang...Kerana tentu anda akan menolaknya mentah mentah. Orang biasapun tak akan rela kalau Islam dihina dihadapan mereka.
Tapi mereka akan menggulung anda perlahan-lahan dari pinggir, sehingga anda tidak sadar.
"Jika seseorang ingin membuat rumah yang kuat, maka dibina tapak yang kuat.Begitulah Islam, jika ingin kuat, maka bangunlah aqidah yang kuat.
Sebaliknya, jika ingin membongkar rumah, tentu susah kalau dimulai dgn
tapaknya dulu, tentu saja hiasan-hiasan dinding akan dikeluarkan dulu,
kerusi dipindahkan dulu, Almari dibuang dulu satu persatu, baru rumah
dihancurkan..."
"Begitulah musuh-musuh Islam menghancurkan kita. Ia tidak akan menghentam terang-terangan, tapi ia akan perlahan-lahan meletihkan anda. Mulai dari perangai anda, cara hidup, pakaian dan lain-lain, sehingga meskipun anda muslim, tapi anda telah meninggalkan ajaran Islam dan mengikuti cara yang mereka... Dan itulah yang mereka inginkan." "Ini semua adalah fenomena Ghazwul Fikri (Perang Pemikiran). Dan inilah yang dijalankan oleh musuh musuh kita... "
"Kenapa mereka tidak berani terang-terang memijak-mijak cikgu?" tanya
murid- murid."Sesungguhnya dahulu mereka terang-terang menyerang, misalnya Perang Salib, Perang Tartar, dan lain-lain. Tapi sekarang tidak lagi." "Begitulah Islam... Kalau diserang perlahan-lahan, mereka tidak akan sedar, akhirnya hancur. Tapi kalau diserang serentak terang-terangan, mereka akan bangkit serentak, baru mereka akan sadar".
"Kalau begitu, kita selesaikan pelajaran kita kali ini, dan mari kita
berdoa dahulu sebelum pulang..." Matahari bersinar terik takala anak-anak itu keluar meninggalkan tempat belajar mereka dengan pikiran masing-masing di kepalanya...
RENUNGILAH SAHABAT SEMUA..
TOLONG SEBARKAN PADA SAUDARA2 ISLAM KITA..MOGA ALLAH MEMBERI TAUFIQ DAN
HIDAYAH PADA KITA DAN KELUARGA KITA... MARILAH KITA SAMA2 SEDAR BAHAWA
AGAMA,BANGSA DAN TANAHAIR KITA SEMAKIN TERANCAM!
UMAT ISLAM SEMAKIN MUDAH DIBELI DENGAN WANG RINGGIT, DILALAIKAN DENGAN
KEINDAHAN DAN MEMUJA KESERONOKAN HIDUP, HINGGA HILANG MARUAH DAN HARGA
DIRI!!
JUSTERU, MARILAH, KITA BETULKAN APA YG TERMAMPU BERSAMA2..USAH HANYA BILA SEGALANYA SUDAH TERJADI, SAMA SEPERTI SAUDARA KITA DINEGARA2 LAINNYA, BARU KESEDARAN ITU TIMBUL, MUNGKIN MASIH BELUM TERLAMBAT TAPI KITA SUDAH TERLEWAT UTK MERUBAH DAN MEMBAIKI KEROSAKAN YG DIALAMI.
Post a Comment
<< Home