Tell me it's real!

It's not easy. It's really, really, difficult. It's hard to ignore the wrongs when you always want to do the right thing. I'm fighting. Vigorously. Though I know I would lose in the end, but I fight for what I have now. I fight to make it last for as long as I could. Though I know I would be defeated by a stronger force. My conscience. My pride. Me. And my will is weaker when my conscience and pride works together. Even weaker if I still have any honour left to work against it. I know I'll do the right thing in the end. I always do. Just grant me this time to feel, to hold. to touch.

They say all is fair in love and war. So, I'm doing a great injustice if I say this is unfair. Instead, I will say lady luck is not on my side. At least, not yet. Besides, I know I'm looking to other things. God is fair. He knows I'm not ready. Even if I say I am. And I know He keeps the best for me. So, who am I to question destiny?

We walk in a path, designated for us. A path that is carved by the decisions we made in the past. I look back, and I understand why I walk on this one. However much I dislike some of the attributes, I know this is the right one. And there is a reason why I walk on it. And I know, because of the decision I made today, my path has been altered accordingly. I just hope I'm given the right amount of strength to walk on. Oh.. there is always a choice, to change, to make new decisions. So, there is nothing to worry about.

Meanwhile, I intend to enjoy whatever that I have now. And hopefully everything will turn out well in the end. Life is too short to keep on worrying. Or be angry. Or be sad. Life goes on. The world does not stop just because we do.