Days of active grey matter
The nation mourns. Still. Al-Fatihah to Allahyarhamah Datin Seri Endon. May she rests with the blessed ones.
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I found out that I could blog from the office. I am able to access the Blogger page, but not browse the blogs to read. Hmm... but then again, seriously, I do not have the hours to blog from office anymore.
My working hours start at 2.30pm. It's wonderful in the sense that I get to get things done in the morning. You know, shopping, spring cleaning, laundry, etc. And maybe cooking, which can only happen after Ramdhan, of course! Ha ha ha... We break for dinner at 7pm. And resume at around 8.30pm. So far, we have not been able to achieve our target, which is to leave the office at 11pm. It's just not possible with the amount of work, and problems to solve.
I have to stop logging to Yahoo Messenger come Monday. It takes my attention of the work, and I became careless. Last week, I was reprimanded. By Hunk. In front of everyone. Serves me right. In fact, my carelessness was so shocking that I could not say a word in my defense. There was NO defense, for I know I was wrong. But, we learn from our mistakes, don't we?
Right, enough about work. Let's talk about something more... pleasant. Personal. More... dreamy? :-p
How much do your dreams affect your future? And how far would you go to make your dreams come true?
I used to be more... of a quiet person than I am now. I used to keep what I really want inside me, hoping that someone would notice, and make it happen. Silly, I know. I did not want to impose. I did not make my stand, and I did not make myself heard. Result, I was trampled all over to hell and back. There was no heaven being a mouse. A door mat. And I used to cry silently, but was afraid to voice out and do something about it.
Now, however, I am more vocal. I say what I want. I mean what I say. And I want what I say. Sometimes, to the extend that people around me could not handle the truth and so much honesty coming out from me. And I stop myself for reality check. Not all people can handle the truth. And not all people can handle plain honesty. Our culture is such a way that we are prone to be hyprocritical than honest. We consider it rude to be so honest, we might hurt the other person's feelings. As such, however honest I want to be, I still need to pause myself and put my words with flowers and butter that sometimes it lost its true impact. But I silently hope that it delivers the message.
Hate is such a strong word. And love is just a step away from it. So, I would instead say, I dislike dishonesty. And once bitten twice shy. I do have difficulty to forget, even if I've forgived. To borrow from The Corrs, forgiven but not forgotten. He he he. Hard. Harsh. That's reality, eh?
Anyway, back to my main question. How far would you go to get what you want? In my case, I think I have to go very, very, very far. The next question is, do I dare? I have not been able to answer that question yet. Taking things day by day, is good. But reality check, we should still be aware of the future. I know. I know. I've said it too many times before, that we should enjoy the minutes that are given to us now. But it is easier said than done. The reality of the future swims in front of my eyes everytime I think about what I have now. And it is just so frustrating that I can't be sure what will happen. (Whack Jade on the head, once, twice, three times. Thank you.)
There are decisions to be made. There are questions to be answered. And there is more than one person to do both. Two in fact. Because it takes two to tango. But who should make the first move? Hints were given, so crystal that they could not be considered as hints anymore. The clock is ticking. And officially, I have approximately 2 months from now to make my dreams come true.
I was told, by an elderly English gentleman that I consider a close friend, "If you really want it as much as I think you do, do something about it, make it happen, because I know that it's mutual". Okay, his exact words were not uttered in that way, but I had to make it more generic, you know... he he he... He's got a point.
I shall do something tomorrow. Because, the Almighty has given me another chance to do something about it. Tomorrow.
Question remain, how far would you go to achieve your dreams?
---------------
I found out that I could blog from the office. I am able to access the Blogger page, but not browse the blogs to read. Hmm... but then again, seriously, I do not have the hours to blog from office anymore.
My working hours start at 2.30pm. It's wonderful in the sense that I get to get things done in the morning. You know, shopping, spring cleaning, laundry, etc. And maybe cooking, which can only happen after Ramdhan, of course! Ha ha ha... We break for dinner at 7pm. And resume at around 8.30pm. So far, we have not been able to achieve our target, which is to leave the office at 11pm. It's just not possible with the amount of work, and problems to solve.
I have to stop logging to Yahoo Messenger come Monday. It takes my attention of the work, and I became careless. Last week, I was reprimanded. By Hunk. In front of everyone. Serves me right. In fact, my carelessness was so shocking that I could not say a word in my defense. There was NO defense, for I know I was wrong. But, we learn from our mistakes, don't we?
Right, enough about work. Let's talk about something more... pleasant. Personal. More... dreamy? :-p
How much do your dreams affect your future? And how far would you go to make your dreams come true?
I used to be more... of a quiet person than I am now. I used to keep what I really want inside me, hoping that someone would notice, and make it happen. Silly, I know. I did not want to impose. I did not make my stand, and I did not make myself heard. Result, I was trampled all over to hell and back. There was no heaven being a mouse. A door mat. And I used to cry silently, but was afraid to voice out and do something about it.
Now, however, I am more vocal. I say what I want. I mean what I say. And I want what I say. Sometimes, to the extend that people around me could not handle the truth and so much honesty coming out from me. And I stop myself for reality check. Not all people can handle the truth. And not all people can handle plain honesty. Our culture is such a way that we are prone to be hyprocritical than honest. We consider it rude to be so honest, we might hurt the other person's feelings. As such, however honest I want to be, I still need to pause myself and put my words with flowers and butter that sometimes it lost its true impact. But I silently hope that it delivers the message.
Hate is such a strong word. And love is just a step away from it. So, I would instead say, I dislike dishonesty. And once bitten twice shy. I do have difficulty to forget, even if I've forgived. To borrow from The Corrs, forgiven but not forgotten. He he he. Hard. Harsh. That's reality, eh?
Anyway, back to my main question. How far would you go to get what you want? In my case, I think I have to go very, very, very far. The next question is, do I dare? I have not been able to answer that question yet. Taking things day by day, is good. But reality check, we should still be aware of the future. I know. I know. I've said it too many times before, that we should enjoy the minutes that are given to us now. But it is easier said than done. The reality of the future swims in front of my eyes everytime I think about what I have now. And it is just so frustrating that I can't be sure what will happen. (Whack Jade on the head, once, twice, three times. Thank you.)
There are decisions to be made. There are questions to be answered. And there is more than one person to do both. Two in fact. Because it takes two to tango. But who should make the first move? Hints were given, so crystal that they could not be considered as hints anymore. The clock is ticking. And officially, I have approximately 2 months from now to make my dreams come true.
I was told, by an elderly English gentleman that I consider a close friend, "If you really want it as much as I think you do, do something about it, make it happen, because I know that it's mutual". Okay, his exact words were not uttered in that way, but I had to make it more generic, you know... he he he... He's got a point.
I shall do something tomorrow. Because, the Almighty has given me another chance to do something about it. Tomorrow.
Question remain, how far would you go to achieve your dreams?
posted by Hajar | 10:33:00 PM
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